Fandom

Future

RyansWorld: Dictionary of Rockese

4,830pages on
this wiki
Add New Page
Comments0 Share

Ad blocker interference detected!


Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.

Special Note: Please note that this scenario is meant to be read as entertainment, not as an accurate prediction of the future. Also note that the viewpoints and opinions that may come across in this scenario are not necessarily the viewpoints and opinions of the author.

The Dictionary of Rockese (known by people born before 1967 as Satan's Ultimate Manifesto) is a dictionary that converts all the commonly-used English words into Rockese.

Summary

Sold at Wal-Mart and on various book stores either online or in physical form, the dictionary becomes a must-own item for the post-rock generation (read: anyone born in the year 1997 or later). Celebrity owners of this book include Ella Sofia Gordon, her brother Leo Benjamin Gordon, along with NASCAR's hottest supercouple: Wyatt and Anne (née Edwards) Sadler. Rockese is a manufactured language that combines Finnish, German and Norwegian. It was nominated to become one of the official languages of the United States of Earth in the year 2089 but the vote was narrowly defeated in the worldwide referendum.

By the year 2025, Rockese becomes the linga franca when to comes to talking to people between the ages of 13 and 30. Never again will a fortysomething pervert be able to date a 16-year-old girl without taking correspondence courses on Rockese either on the Internet, Twitter, or Second Life. Skate shops, most teen-oriented websites, high schools, colleges, universities, internet cafes, and libraries will post all their signs in English and Rockese in order to maintain an adolescent audience. Just prior to the criminialization of television in 2040, limited television stations will pop up playing news, sports, television shows, and even movies in Rockese. YouTube eventually becomes the adoptive form of media for Rockese after the worldwide television ban of 2040.

Google Earth would be programmed with an option to view it in either English or Rockese. There will be enough memory in the computers of tomorrow for both. Attempts will be made to create a Rockese Wikipedia, a computer with a keyboard that can write in Rockese, and even Rockese classes starting in the fourth grade and ending with serious doctoral studies on things like the history of Rockese and Rockese literature. The holographic movie theatres of the future will give the option to either hear the English version or pay five extra dollars to put on special headphones that will translate all the words in the movies to Rockese.

There will be some attempts to revive Pig Latin as a serious language after Rockese becomes popular. However, Rockese will outlast the "Pig Latin" fad that the parents of Rockese users will temporarily adopt. Google will create a Rockese version of their search engine and Yahoo will quickly followed along with MSN Search Engine and Bing. In the video game emulation scene, classic games are constantly being translated into Rockese (even ROM hacks and unlicensed games). It helps to know that no new video games will be made until the 2060s because of the Gaming Depression. By the year 2039, video games can only be played on an emulator, the Internet, or through antique console systems bought in yard sales and flea markets.

Also on Fandom

Random Wiki